indiogrl's Cancer Blog
October 6, 2008
| Singing in the Car | Views: 494 |
Good morning… it’s getting colder here in Michigan, summer is pretty much over and fall is here… I was so sick this time last year, the memories are bitter… but time continues to march on and lucky for me I am so much better this year.
I like music. Mostly I like current, popular stuff… right now my current favorites are Rehab by Rhianna (not played on the radio, but on the new CD) and I Don’t Care by Fall Out Boy… I love hip hop and pop and anything fast and fun. I bring this up because one of my favorite things to do before cancer was to sing in the car.
Now, I am not a good singer by any means. But being alone in the car, blasting out some feel good music and singing at the top of my lungs just felt SO GOOD. After the radiation to my neck area, though, my voice changed. It’s very raspy and hoarse sounding. And one of the things I miss so much is singing in the car. Of course I still try – I look at it as excercise for my vocal cords. But it’s not the same.
So many things after cancer are not the same. So many little things we didn’t totally appreciate before cancer. But you know what – this is really a gift, to be able to appreciate these things in such a deep, grateful way. Like FOOD! BTW I weighed myself this morning and I’ve gained 3 pounds. Which at one time I would have been thrilled about but now I’ve kind of settled into my new weight, and last spring I bought all new clothes so I don’t really want to gain any more… really I cannot afford to buy new clothes agian.
So my “free food ride” I think is ending. I am going to have to go back to normal eating, not eating whatever the heck I want and not worrying about it. I was in San Francisco last week for work and actually that’s probably where those 3 pounds came from – we chowed the whole time we were there. The crab was awesome!
Normal is good! I just want to sing in the car again! And I don’t care if the other drivers look at me funny!
Thanks for your support -
Great to hear you are living in the moment. Your voice will be raspy for sometime. It has now been 4 months exactly since the end of my neck radiation. My voice is still improving. Still raspy, but finally in the past couple of weeks i’ve noticed improvements in the throat area, where i had a lot of trouble eating and was having the gag reflex where i would almost throw up for no reason. Also i am getting used to eating solids again, and learning how to eat with virtually no saliva. And actually now my saliva is starting to come back a bit. It’s thick spit but it’s an improvement.
So keep singing girl! Savor the moment and appreciate what you do have. Don’t let the fear of what the future might bring wreck the blessings you have at this moment.
I like singing in the shower also. But some times it sound funny mouth full of water! LL. It is good you are in a good place where ever that mat be.
Hug Sherri
You go girl. I do the same thing.
Make a “joyful noise”. Quality matters not. What matters is the joy in the singing. Let others mock if they will, you know where the joyfulness of your song comes from and are a better person for that knowledge.
Mac
After watching Canadian Idol, American Idol, we all know how those kids sang no matter what the quality of the singing was. And some of it was pretty awful, however when you saw their faces, beaming with pride you just knew it was their spirit shining through that the audience appreciated. So sing away, raspy and all for god hears you, the wind hears you and most of all you are strengthening your vocal chords. It’s so lovely to hear your chirping that you are happy and that life is good. I agree.
Weezie